On a More Serious Note

I have this mirror.

Some stories haunt our dreams.  Others have a character who will peck away at your brain until you cave and write them.  And others still begin with the certain type of person who desperately needs to discover that even the ancient powers of darkness are tired of his nonsense.

More or less, that's how this one came along.

I have lots of ideas but not as much time to write them so I leave myself detailed notes.  The newest idea is a Southern Gothic dark comedy set in a fictional town in 1890 Tennessee.  It follows a rather self-important individual named Ambrose who believes the supernatural world is intensely invested in his grievances.

Unfortunately for Ambrose, the supernatural world has other things to do.

The story is told through the eyes of a Dark Mother Goddess who Ambrose keeps on attempting to summon.  She's ancient, powerful, feared, worshipped, and 1,000% done with this mortal who has somehow mistaken her for his personal revenge department.

The first summoning might have been an accident.

The second suggested arrogance.

By the seventh, she realizes that she has quite the recurring problem.

The supernatural creatures in this book are frightening.

Ambrose is exhausting.

And that distinction is important.

So, why am I writing this?

Beneath the gothic atmosphere and the comedy, there is something much more personal beneath this story.

I have escaped an abusive situation myself.  I'm not going to name him as I don't believe he's worth the energy.

I don't plan on turning this book, or even this post, into a detailed account of what happened to me.  This manuscript isn't about me.

One of the oddest things about abusive and controlling relationships is the enormous mythology the abuser can construct around themselves both past and present.  They become the tragic hero, the misunderstood genius, the victim of everyone else's cruelty.  Every boundary becomes persecution, every consequence is betrayal, and the person who walks away becomes the villain.

Them:  "You are such an asshole."

Me:

Sometimes it's the only way.

And sometimes the only reasonable artistic response is to hand that person a candle, lock them in the haunted attic, and let the old goddess stare at them like:  "Oh, for the love of Zeus.  Not this one again!"

This is where the humor in this story lives.

The joke isn't abuse.

The joke isn't the person trying to escape.

The joke is the towering and yet very fragile ego of someone convinced that heaven, hell, the ancestors, the dead, several ancient deities, and the entire spirit realm must all validate his version of events.

Where the Money Is Going

There is another part of this project that I feel is very important:

Any and all author profits that I receive from this book will be donated to organizations helping people affected by domestic violence.

I don't want this story to only benefit me.  I'd rather take it and redirect it to whatever good comes from it towards helping people trying to rebuild safter lives.

There is something wonderfully appropriate about that.

A story about an abusive man's desperate attempts to reclaim power ultimately helping people escape abusive people.

Ambrose would absolutely hate that.

The Dark Mother would approve.

A Serious Note

For as many jokes I may be able to insert into this story, real-world abuse isn't funny and leaving an abusive relationship can be complicated and dangerous.

There's no one single or correct to leave.

Not everyone can do as I did and just leave immediately.  The fact that both my neighbors were heavily armed, that I knew a lot of the police, may have been what helped save me.  Sometimes a person has to quietly make plans over weeks or months.  Sometimes they can leave and return several times before they are finally able to stay away.  There are so many factors that can make "just leave" a very unhelpful thing to say.

If you do need help there are many numbers you can contact.

If you're in the USA like I am the National Domestic Violence Hotline can be reached at 1-800-799-7233, or by texting START to 88788.

If you are a man in a domestic violence situation please reach out here.

https://mensadviceline.org.uk/

For all international readers: Please visit Lila.help to find a trusted domestic or gender-based violence organization in your country.

A note about digital safety: An abusive person may monitor phones, computers, browser histories, location services, phone bills or online accounts. If you believe your device is being monitored, consider accessing these resources from a safer device when possible.

And if someone you care about is living through something like this, one of the most valuable things you can offer is a place where they can speak without being interrogated about why they stayed, why they went back, or why they didn't recognize the danger sooner.

Sometimes survival is messy but it is still survival.